2004-08-04 - 12:17 p.m.
So, didn't end up calling mummy after all, bad son. soon though. soon.
I did research into the holes in the lawn. Delicious is convinced they are beetles as she saw one coming out of a hole but I have done some serious research and, coupled with my findings (the Killer wasp and the cicada episode) I have uncovered what I believe to be the culprit. IT'S THE WASP!!!
These Cicada Killer Wasps (for that is their name, very original also called the Sand Hornet) is a lone beast, it doesn't have friends or a communal "nest". it digs a burrow about an inch wide and about four or five inches deep!! kills and paralises a cicada and drops it in the hole and then shoves loads of babies in the cicadas insides so they have somewhere warm and cosy and nutricious when they hatch! EEW.
I don't think I will kill the little fuckers now though as I much prefer having a swarm of 2 inch long wasps around my front door than a shit load of cicadas eating my trees and pissing sap all over our cars! I HATE THEM. and they are noisy. The wasps are scary as fuck but I have been running up and down the lawn with a lawn mower and they care not. I doubt they would sting me as I won't fit into the hole they have dug and I'm sure they don't have enough sting to bring me down.
So I will wait for them to have their fun and then fix my lawn later.
Unless I am wrong, which, although the idea seems fantasticly hard to beleive I know, could be the case. That would cause me to have to eat my words and deal with Delicous' quiet yet still unnervingly irritating smile that simply drools of "I told you so" or "neer neeer na neer neeer"
Still, the last laugh will end up being mine anyway cos I will have beetles as sculptures instead of wasps.
ho hum.
its so hard being me.
so little to do and so much time!
(strike that, reverse it)
The weekend promises to be overloaded with depravity and abuse, some of our nearest and dearest friends are converging on a property in Millbury, Massechuessets. A wonderous resort styled chalet that our friends spend all their time making cooler, when they are not partying themselves. it has a hot tub, although I'm hoping its a cold tub this weekend?!?! a pool, a bar, a fucking enormous television. I could go on but the fireplace isn't really worth mentioning in summer is it.
Im heading up Friday hopefully, Delicious will co-pilot and no doubt it will be Norah Jones all the way up there (soothes my delicious' worried head you see, car riding is not on her list of favorite pass times - medically and emotionally) I will no doubt have to have a quick blast of Korn or something after three hours of that.
p
*
*
